Celebrate Legitimate Meat

Posted on December 28, 2010


None of this post was meant to imply I have any reservations toward consuming meat whatsoever, except conceptually disgusting meat products.

I enjoy how the narrator almost speaks like a generic South Park character and I also enjoy the chick losing her cool in front of the camera at (1:06), fumbling for her pen.

When you couple this terribly unappetizing perspective with a video of poultry being mechanically “separated,” the magic of revulsion really starts to work its charm.

I didn’t believe this picture at first, but I understand it a little better now. When I showed my pops the video above, and then the image of the infamous “pink goop,” he didn’t really see the connection.

My guess is that whatever comes out of the “poultry deboner” is processed until we get something a bit more solid, such as the goop snaking its way into a box. Mix that shit with some filler, flavor, and eventually bleach it so it comes out like that product that ALWAYS tastes the same.

For respite: an image of juicy, unadulterated nuggets

I got into this because of Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential, because he starting spitting Italian entrees I had never heard before and cuts of beef I couldn’t locate in me mind.

It’s sad to me that it’s taken nearly two decades for me to realize how disgusting McDonald’s really is. I can’t even call it a guilty pleasure anymore because of its abominable manufacturing process. I’ve never attended culinary school, but I’ve come to appreciate good cooking skills, as well as genuinely tasty and healthy meals.

I suppose it bothers me that so many good meals are being missed out on because of laziness, because of a few extra bucks, but I also suppose this is why cooks enjoy cooking for those they care about. It’s an elaborate magic trick, pleasing once again, another pink organ.

And now for the foodgasms:

In a kitchen filled with morons, the man’s a bloody, short-fused egotist, but he can definitely cook!

I haven’t made the Beef Wellington yet, but I have made the sticky lemon chicken, and I’m not exaggerating by saying that this is some of the tastiest chicken I’ve ever made.

And here you go, some concise knife handling instructions, yeah?